Incorrect Pairing
by Perry-Dice
Summary: Some pairings are just right. Some are not. Explore the world of crack pairing! LXHideki Ryuga and more!
1. L X Hideki Ryuga

Incorrect Pairings

Prologue

The sounds of chips being crunched and the television blaring floated up from the basement. Two young teens lay sprawled in front of the T.V., one with a laptop, the other with a bowl of corn chips. On the screen animated people with large eyes and multi-colored hair were engaging in an epic battle of some sorts.

"Hey Becca quit hogging the chips." Said the girl with the laptop, flicking her badly dyed bangs.

"Oh, are you reading fanfiction? Any good ones?" Said Becca, ignoring the request and peering over her friends shoulder.

"Not really, all the pairings in these things are so boring."

Becca rolled her eyes behind her glasses and grabbed the laptop from her friend. The screen reflected white in her lenses as she scanned the page.

"Kim, you think all pairings are boring. In reality these are the pairings that make sense, the right pairings. People don't want to read the weird ones, they don't make good stories." Becca absent-mindedly placed the bowl of chips on the table in front of her as she continued to scroll down the page.

"We could write fanfictions that made them work. Some people just don't have our creativity." Kim ran her fingers through her streaky purple bangs again.

"Look at all these Death Note stories, some of the pairings would just be too wrong to work." Becca continued to ramble.

"Oh my gosh I love Death Note so much!" Squealed Kim and the two girls forgot about pairings for a while as they rejoiced in the glory of a fandom.

"I think L and Light are so cute together." Becca sighed but this jolted Kim back to the previous topic.

"But they aren't the correct pairing Becca, L should be with Misa!"

"There is basically no evidence to support that."

"That is what I'm talking about, people don't always agree about the "correct" pairing," Kim made air quotes and continued to talk animatedly, "We could write stories that would convince people that the wrong pairings were right. You just have to write them right and they become right, right?"

The two girls exploded into laughter at that and stayed up late into the night watching their cartoons, but they had not forgotten their goal…

Chapter 1

"So L, he's the best detective in the world, he's mostly crazy, he's insanely rich, he can have anything but all he wants is justice. " Kim began dramatically.

"And cake." Becca added, ruining the mood.

"So we can't decide who is right for him but I'm sure we can decide who is wrong for him." Kin continued grandly.

"You know who is deserves some more fandom love? Hideki Ryuga!" Becca said excitedly.

"Perfect."

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L had met Hideki Ryuga some years before while working on another case involving a missing celebrity, a jealous nanny and several blind parrots but that is a story for another day. L had not really thought about Ryuga since that case but now that one of his chief suspects was making a movie with him he began to recall vague memories of the man. It was only natural that they should meet once more when Misa brought him back to her apartments for dinner one night.

He sat next to Light as usual who sat next to Misa, holding her hand with the same detached disgust he usually did. The handcuff that dangled from his other hand and strung over to L's was not ignored by Ryuga who stared at it when conversation lagged. L did not speak. He was invisible now, just a watcher, a minor inconvenience. This is why he was mildly surprised when the pop star suddenly looked at him and addressed him personally.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?" The young man's perfect brow creases slightly but he kept smiling his friendly but blindingly white smile.

"Macaw cataracts." L said with a shrug and recognition dawned beautifully across Hideki Ryuga's smooth face.

Misa and Light were a bit thrown and Misa even looked a bit put out as Ryuga spent the rest of the evening more engaged with L than with her cringe worthy accounts of Light's heroism.

L found that there was a certain comfort in talking with someone so used to expressing emotion in the most obvious way possible. When dealing with thieves and liars all day it was pleasant to be with someone completely honest, someone who even genuinely liked you. Actors were used to strange people and Ryuga was the model of politeness, not even mentioning the handcuffs.

"You know I like you, Ryuzaki, you're a pretty interesting guy. I'd like to get to know you better some time." Ryuga said finally, stretching his move star muscles and standing up. He finally looked back at Misa. "I've had a wonderful time here tonight, thank you."

L dragged Light along as he trailed Misa and Hideki Ryuga to the door. He felt slightly empty when he thought that he would probably never see the man again. He would probably die, surrounded by thieves and liars and people who hated him and people who would have killed him if they had the chance. He couldn't seem to quell the bitter melancholy that was seeping coldly into his stomach.

"Hey Ryuzaki? Do you want to go for a walk with me maybe? We could go back to my place and get some coffee." L looked up, genuinely shocked this time. Ryuga's smile was warm and inviting. He reached out a hand and put it gently on L's, the one not connected to Light. Sparks shot up L's arm and he could feel Ryuga's fingers tremble with anticipation.

"I would like that, would you give me a minute." L quickly pulled away and yanked Light into Misa's bedroom, shutting the door. "Okay Light here's the deal: I let you off the handcuffs and you go strait to your room where Watari watches you like an eagle on camera and if you do anything I swear I will convict you." L snarled, pulling a key from his pocket and jamming it into the cuffs. Light was laughing too hard do anything's but gasp,

"He's a pop star."

"I am aware of that but if I want to get away for my doomed life for one night of passionate and commitmentless sex with national sex symbols who might not want to kill me, I will." He rubbed his wrist and turned the door handle, nervous energy making his hands shake.

"Do what you need to I guess, it's the only way to live. If something makes you happy I guess you just have to take a chance and go for it. Congratulations L, welcome to real life." Light said and than chuckled to him self, "Hideki Ryuga."

That was almost human coming from Light. Sometimes the thieves and liars weren't so bad to live with as long as you kept positive. Sometimes it was the only thing to do.

Misa and Light watched as L and Ryuga walked off out of Light's window. Misa sighed and told Light she thought it was cute. Light did not believe in cute so he proceeded to tear off Misa's clothes and not care what eagle eye Watari saw.

"Hideki Ryuga," he laughed to himself again, "Sayu is not going to be happy about this."

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"That was so weird." Said Kim, slightly appalled by what they had written.

"Call me crazy but it almost was cute." Said Becca with wonder. Kim hit Becca on the head with the chips for that but still giggled,

"Lets write another."


	2. Misa X Mikami

"So who should we write about next?" Kim asked, her eyes glowing and her fingers flexing over the laptop's keyboard.

"I dunno," pondered Becca, "I sort of feel bad for Misa after that last story. If she doesn't get L she gets stuck with stupid Light forever."

"I guess your right but who should we pair her with?" Kim wondered.

"How about Matsuda! He's cute and he has a crush on her and-"

"No, absolutely not, that is so boring." Kim cut Becca off with a scathing look. "We need someone that is her polar opposite, someone who she never even meets."

"Someone whose not cheerful or spontaneous who never is introduced to Misa?" Becca thought for a moment. The both girls realized at the same time and whispered in awed unison.

"Mikami."

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Misa Amane was bored and lonely. Her fiancé hadn't gotten home before ten in weeks now and she missed him. He was usually spending time with Misa's current least favorite person in the world, Kiyome Takada.

Misa had never claimed to be an unselfish girl when it came to Light but it was amazing to see how she suffered in silence around him, never daring to mention that anything he did could be wrong. She contented herself with wishing a slow and violent death to Kiyome Takada.

Misa also would never admit to wishing death on a fellow human. Her beloved was heading the investigation against the mass murderer Kira who Misa used to support. Sometimes when Misa thought too hard about Light and Kira she got the strange feeling that she should remember something about them but she usually dismissed the notion. The dreaded Kiyome in fact was a suspect in the Kira case but Misa could not bring herself to feel sympathy for a cause she used to support when that woman was at its root.

Misa was also very familiar with Light's persuasion technique when it came to attractive young women. It made her sick to think about it. Some how she could not bring herself to feel angry at Light so she paced around her empty apartment full of undirected anger and ready to explode.

When the clock passed eleven Misa could take more so she stalked out into the rainy streets and tried to give up her fury to the moonlight. The city was slick with wet and full of lights, which gleamed and reflected in the puddles. As an endless stream of bodies pressed against her Misa felt the overwhelming loneliness in her chest threaten to erupt so she ducked quickly into an alley.

She tried crying for a minute, pressing herself against the dirty sides of the buildings and letting tears slide down her face. The crying didn't make her feel better so she kicked over all the trashcans in the alley and screamed a little. A grimy window on one side of the alley was pried open with some difficulty and a voice requested her to silence herself, although the language it actually employed was far less polite. Misa breathed hard for another minute, her fists clenched, stealing herself for going back home to wait with a smile for Light.

Another window opened, this one from the other apartment building, shiny and well oiled.

"Are you alright?" A man asked with real concern in his voice. Misa thought for a moment, catching her breath.

"No." She finally said throwing up her hands in defeat.

"Do you need anything? Do you just need to talk about it?" She could see the man leaning his head out of the window, neat black hair and serious eyes shining behind a pair of glasses.

"Yes." She said. Trust had always come easily to Misa Amane.

"You can come up if you need to, you don't have to." The man looked nervous, unused to strangers walking into his life with open arms.

"Okay, thank you." The man met Misa by the elevator and told her his name was Teru Mikami. Misa introduced herself and then immediately began to sob on his shoulder. Mikami was afraid but he had never been a man who had let that interfere with what he knew was right.

"He's always gone and I'm so lonely when he leaves because he's everything to me and I need him but he doesn't need me." Mikami let Misa spill out her heart and made her a cup of tea. When she finished talking Mikami patted her on the back and told her things would be okay. Misa smiled at her and he felt his stomach lurch because he wasn't used to people so open with him. Mikami was a man who breathed secrets.

"I can always come see you now if I get lonely. We're friends now, if you don't mind." Misa snuggled up against Mikami and he almost leapt away, shy of being touched.

"You're too trusting." The words burst out of him and he regretted it almost instantly. It was he who was the pathetic, paranoid fool who was so afraid of closeness. Misa just smiled angelically at him.

"Maybe I am. But I don't see the point in not letting someone into your heart. Life comes too fast for you not to care. I'm just not afraid anymore." Mikami felt humbled by the wisdom in this beautiful young woman's voice.

"I respect that. You can come and see me if you need help."

Misa Amane did come and see him after that. Sometimes it was late at night when her absent lover was away on some conquest. Sometimes she would show up at his office after work because she grew bored with no one else at home.

When they met they would just talk about what ever was on their mind but Misa had a way of disrupting Mikami's tightly regulated schedule. For the first time in his life he was late for an appointment after Misa had spontaneously decided that they should go to the park. Mikami would not admit to himself why he let her do this to him when no one else ever could. Mikami would not let himself say he loved her. He knew that she could never return that feeling, he knew that if she was capable of loving anyone but that disgusting excuse for a man, she would. Mikami let himself hate him.

Misa admitted that she sometimes felt empty. That it bothered her to sacrifice her beliefs for love. She learned that Mikami was a proud and passionate supporter of Kira and she let herself bask in the glorious feeling of shared ideals. Sometimes they would discuss plans for the new world and anticipate the changes but Misa would always feel guilty afterwards because this felt like betrayal. Misa Amane told Mikami often that he was a good man and that her overwhelming trust was not always misplaced. Misa also told him her favorite color and her favorite food and the name of her favorite book. Misa told him that he was her best friend. Mikami told himself that she was his only friend.

They fell into easy rhythm together, a sort of peace that they had not know existed. They had different lives, different purposes, different desires and different endings. Somehow there was something in them that was overwhelmingly the same.

One day as they walked back to Mikami's apartment Misa told him that she was worried because tomorrow would probably be the end of the Kira case, one way or another. Mikami was quiet for a moment.

"Yes, tomorrow will be the end."

"I'm afraid. I don't know what will happen." Misa said and linked her fingers with Mikami's, a habit they had fallen in to. A light misty rain was falling on the city around them and water dripped off of Misa's eyelashes like tears. Mikami took a deep breath.

"We're the ones who get left behind, you know. We're the ones who get used."

"What do you mean?" Asked Misa, looking a bit stricken.

"I let myself be a tool of god. I give up myself for god. You do that for your…" Mikami spat the word out like it hurt him, "boyfriend. We're never going to change. We will never be able to get away. Never have anything for ourselves." Mikami could not keep the bitterness out of his voice.

"We have this for ourselves. We just have to make it all that we need." Misa whispered in her gentle voice.

"I always need more." Mikami's voice broke when he said it and he felt reckless because tomorrow would change everything anyway. "I always need you."

Misa suddenly pulled away from him and he knew he had gone too far. She stared at him in shock and possibly horror. Mikami took off his glasses because they were too foggy to see out of. Even without them he saw Misa give a defeated sigh.

"It seems to be truly impossible for me to live without guilt." And then Misa Amane kissed Teru Mikami right on the mouth as the rain slowly soaked them both.

They would never know the irony that the man who used them, the man who would kill them, was the same for both. They would never even see each other again after that night. But they did not need to now that. They only needed kinship, they only needed something safe and certain and warm, they only needed each other.

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"Aww, that one was really adorable." Said Becca clasping her hands and sighing.

"Yeah that almost was." Kim conceded, looking slightly awed.

"This is really fun! Basically everyone seems to make a good pairing." Becca squealed, bouncing around on the couch.

"Don't worry," Kim grinned wickedly, "we'll find a horrible one eventually."


	3. Mello X Takada

"So we've written two and I keep becoming convinced that they are a really cute couple. I'm starting to think that everyone should be a couple!" Becca said, her voice getting progressively louder and shriller.

"That's not a good thing Becca." Grumbled Kim, trying as usual to dampen Becca's glee.

"I think we should write about Mello next!" Becca continued unfazed, refusing to be dampened.

"Well his correct pairing is defiantly Matt. And I'm not going to pair him with Near. And him with L is just unpleasant to think about." Kim attempted to shoot down all of Becca's ideas before she could voice them.

"What about Takada, that's just creepy enough"

Becca's bright cheerfulness was indomitable so Kim agreed and began to write.

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Kiyome Takada sits naked on the floor in front of a man in leather pants.

He is exciting, he is dangerous, she hates him. He has kidnapped her.

He hands her a sheet and mutters something about being back soon. She concentrates on her burning hatred for him. She pictures the man she loves; his image is imprinted in her mind. He is beautiful, he is clever, he smiles at her and touches her back in just the right place when he walks next to her. He also promises to make her a goddess. That helps her love him more.

Takada wraps herself in the cold and unfamiliar sheet. She is afraid, her heart is pounding. But she will not let herself be afraid, she is a proud and capable woman. She is intelligent and respected, she will escape from this. She also has a piece of the Death Note that he didn't take. This will help her escape.

Kiyome Takada still feels that future goddesses should not be subject to such indignity.

The room is cold and silent and she gets that funny feeling she has been having lately of pressure in her chest. She gets it when she uses her Death Note. Or when she thinks about her Death Note. Or when she imagines the people she has killed…

Kiyome Takada does not let herself think about the dead anymore. In this cold little silent room it will be too much.

Misa Amane keeps swimming into Takada's mind now, her horrible stick-like body contorting in Takada's mind and her sickly sweet whine purring into Takada's ears. She tries not to think about Light and how he is still dating the wretched girl. She knows that he only does it because he has to, for the new world. But Misa Amane is still whispering that Light does love Misa or worse, he loves both women the same.

She would never admit that it bothered her. She would never admit that Misa Amane could be a threat to her.

It feels like hours have past since he locked her in the room. She wants to scream. It is too silent in the room. It is too loud, she is going deaf. Light won't come for her. Light won't help her. Light doesn't love her.

Kiyome Takada is not a goddess; she is a silly little girl. She is going to die.

He comes back into the room. He smells like sweat and fear and anger and passion. He stands there, like he does not know why he has come back. He looks lost, he looks like she feels: abandoned.

"My name is Kiyome Takada." She says and feels stupid because he must know her name, why else would he have kidnapped her?

"My name-" He looks confused. "They call me Mello." He is fingering a crucifix, rubbing the metal like a magic lamp.

"Are you going to kill me?" She forces the words out as a whisper.

"Are you going to kill me?" He asks her back. They both do not know the answer. They both know the ending.

"It's almost over." He says, meaning it in all senses. They are silent and afraid together. They are lost and desolate together. They are going to die together.

Kiyome Takada does not know how it happens. She just knows that his stomach is grooved the perfect shape for her lips.

Mello's touch is hot and frantic and they fill the cold room with heat and noise and life. She stops caring about the place on her back where Light touches her, damn the spot because it's practically the only place he will touch her. Mello cannot stop touching her. She fools herself into thinking that she will always be alive like this.

She is getting all the life in that she can before it is too late. She has found this too late.

Kiyome Takada finally discovers how to be wild and how to be passionate and how to be brave. This is what she and Mello are: bravery.

They both do things they are ashamed to think about.

Mello uncurls his body from hers and drags himself from the room, rubbing his crucifix and muttering about god and chocolate.

Takada wraps herself in the hot, damp sheet and finally pulls out the secret phone with its little scrap of paper inside. She cries as she dials Light's number and when he answers the phone she becomes a goddess again.

A dirty, broken goddess crying in a quiet room.

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"That one wasn't cute." Becca broke the long silence that had stretched between them when they finished the story.

"Agreed." Kim said. "More like insanely depressing."

"That doesn't mean it wasn't super hot!" Becca dodged Kim's fist and laughed. "This is so much fun!"


	4. Near X Ryuk

"This time we have to make sure our pairing isn't cute or sexy at all" Proclaimed Kim. Becca looked slightly disappointed but nodded. "The point of this story is hilarious crack pairings but we keep making the weird pairings adorable and it needs to stop."

"Ok." Becca pondered, "What is a pairing that is in no way cute, sexy or even vaguely normal?"

"I was thinking that we should write about Near next because we just wrote about Mello." Kim stretched and flexed her fingers of the keyboard of the laptop.

"Who would be disturbing with Near? Oh! Oh! I've got it! Ryuk!"

"Becca, this is why we're friends."

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Once upon a time there was a boy and a death god. The boy was very smart and the death god liked the boy because he was interesting. They went on many adventures. Then one day the boy died.

The death god was bored without the boy. There was nothing fun to do.

So the death god found the man who had killed his boy. He asked him,

"Why did you kill my boy, man?"

The man said,

"I did it because he was trying to kill my friends."

So the death god went to one of the man's friends and he asked,

"Why did my boy try to kill you?"

And the man's friend said,

"Because we were working for the detective."

So the death god went looking for the detective. The detective was very mysterious and hard to find so the death god asked the people he met if they knew the detective. None of the people knew the detective until one said,

"The detective lives in that big house over there."

So the death go went to the big house. The big house was full of children so he asked one of the children,

"Have you seen the detective?"

And the child said,

"He is there." And the child pointed to another boy who sat alone wearing white. The death god talked to the boy detective and he asked,

"Why did you kill my boy?"

The boy detective said,

"Because that is what I do." And the death god decided that this was a very interesting job that would not be boring at all.

So the death god stayed with the boy detective whose job was not boring. The boy detective was very smart and the death god liked the boy because he was interesting.

The boy detective was very lonely. The boy had no mother or father or friends. But the death god was the boy's friend. The death god always stayed with the boy.

Years past and the boy turned into a man. The man turned into an old man. The death god still remained with the boy.

Sometimes the death god missed his old boy. He missed how that boy would get angry or get scared. But this new boy was more like him. He did not get scared or angry, he was just interested. And this boy had more apples.

One day when the boy was a very old man he became very sick. The boy said to the death god,

"I am not interesting anymore." And the death god knew that the boy-who-was-an-old-man was going to die and then the death god would have to be lonely. They were both very lonely.

When the boy-who-was-old died the death god was very sad. He knew that he would live forever and never see his boy again. He knew he would be bored forever. He did not want to live forever. The death god was so sad he began to cry.

When the death god cried for his boy a miracle occurred. The old man was no more and the death god saw his boy standing before him.

"We are what is left behind." Said the boy-who-was-no-longer-an-old-man, "We are the ones who remember." And the boy took the death god's hand and together they walked away off of the world and into the sky.

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"We are so sick." Becca stared at the screen. "What is wrong with us?"

"How was that not intensely creepy?" Kim wondered aloud.

"It was, somehow it just sounded really sweet." Becca's eyes shone.

"This is a strange and wonderful power." Said Kim with an eager energy growing in her stomach. More needed to be written.


	5. Matsuda X Wedy

"I want to write about Matsuda." Kim stated.

"Oh boy, I love Matsuda, he's so funny!" Becca summoned her usual enthusiasm in an instant.

"Who is someone who Matsuda is not traditionally paired with?" Kim asked.

"Well he usually gets to hook up with Sayu so I guess that's the correct pairing, but the incorrect pairing would be…" Becca trailed off, thinking hard.

"Weddy! That one chick who just sort of hangs out with them for a while, she's like Matsuda's polar opposite, all unfeeling and aloof."

"And I'm pretty sure we know by now," Said Becca with a grin, "Opposites attract."

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I hate nature. Like, a lot.

My legs were shaking as I trudged up yet another hill, swatting at insects. Tree branches were tearing at my hair and I was pretty sure that the plants I had just waded through were going to give me a rash. Why had I thought a leather shirt was a good idea?

Up ahead of me my "date" was bounding along enthusiastically. I was so sick with heat and fatigue I was beginning to envy his idiotic tracksuit. This was the last time I did pity dates.

He had always been really sweet to me in a bumbling lost puppy sort of way. He had been so down after getting into that spot of trouble with the Yotsuba company I just had to do something for him.

But when he said he was going to take me out to do something exciting I never imagined this. Hiking. Sweat, filth, bugs, trees, and other useless stuff.

I couldn't stop now though, that would be giving up. I would not be defeated by something as low as wildlife. I was an American after all; we were supposed to be able to do these things.

Perhaps I had had one too many nights out with the wrong kind of guys. I craved speed and sex usually and probably plenty to drink. Matsuda didn't fit the pattern.

*.

"You really know how to screw things up don't you." I stretched out my legs beside him on the mattress. I rubbed my heels together absently but I could see him watching my legs.

"I guess that's just what I do." He sighed, sounding defeated.

"I like that. You can through a wrench into even the best plans. You can make things spontaneous and fun. I like that." He looked startled at that and I wondered for a second if I had pronounced all the words right. But of course I had, I'm an ace at languages.

"Excuse me?" He looked confused, a little hurt, and wondering of I was making fun of him.

"It's almost like a talent. You'd be good on the inside, you could mess everything up. Not even the cleverest criminal mastermind in the world could lay a plan that would stop you." He blushed when I drew closer to him. I could play this kid like a fiddle.

"Wedy would you like to see me after this? We could go get some coffee or…" The words rushed out of him in that charming splutter that makes women so at ease.

I gave in like that and he was grinning like a million dollars. Little did I suspect my mistake.

*

Screw organic food and eco-friendly I was buying a hummer. The trail still stretched, impossibly long before my and my breath was coming in great heavy gasps now.

"Wedy, lets take a break here." He said, looking down the trail at me.

"No… really I'm… fine let's… keep going." I panted.

He perched on a log and invited me to sit. I collapsed.

"I'm really glad you came with me today. I know I'm the ditz but it's nice just for once to get the girl."

He thought he had me, I'd show him. I was Wedy, I belonged to no man. I could kick his pathetic butt in a second, just as soon as I got my breath back.

"I can't really do anything useful. All I've done during this whole Kira investigation seems to learn to make the best cup of coffee in town. It's nice to know that at least someone thinks I'm cute."

He thinks he's so cute, well he is, but then again he is wearing a sweatband on his arm, which cannot be normal.

"I guess what I want to say is, thank you for my self-confidence." Then he kissed me in the middle of the forest. It was a good kiss.

When we broke apart I was momentarily stunned by the sweeping beauty of the grand bows and trunks, delicate insects flitting between them like fairies, lush green moss carpeting the ground. Maybe nature wasn't so bad after all when you had possibly the most adorable boy in sweat pants holding your hand.

"We're almost at the end of the trail." He mumbled in my ear. I smiled at him.

"You are a gentleman Matsuda, maybe you could hook me up with that best cup of coffee in town you mentioned…

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"Matsuda is a massive stud." Becca said decidedly.

"I'm really loving our not so subtle foreshadowing about Matsuda ruining peoples plans." Kim grinned.

"I think most people fit together a lot better than you would expect." Becca mused in a rare moment of thought.


	6. Aizawa X Halle

"I have just thought of something." Becca announced.

"Well that's a first." Snickered Kim, snorting with laughter at herself.

"All of our really adorable pairings eventually end with death. One of the characters always ends up dead in the series." Becca continued, ignoring Kim, "Well except for that Ryuk/Near thing but we don't need to talk about that."

Kim gave a horrified shiver of agreement. "I guess you're right, everyone does sort of die in this show. It's a little depressing."

"I think we owe it to the show to write one story about the survivors." Becca placed her hand on her chest and straightened her glasses.

"Alright but it can't be that lame." Muttered Kim, looking away. "Who survives the series that no one cares about?"

"We have most of the task force and the SPK. We've already written about Near and Matsuda."

"What about Halle Lidner? She was that tough SPK chic who didn't really do much other than take a shower." Kim suggested.

"That sounds good, we have a strong female heroin. Who would be a terrible pairing with her?" Becca and Kim were silent for a long time. "Ok so basically anyone could be with her out of our options. She seems like she should be paired with Mello but she could date any of those guys with no problem."

"What about Aizawa ?" Kim pointed out.

"He's married!"

"That's why it's interesting, Becca!"

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"Are you going to be home tonight?" She sighed into the phone with defeat in her voice, asking a question she already knew the answer to. Aizawa didn't want to answer, to deliver today's excuses. Granted, today they were better than usual.

"Honey, I have a lot on my plate right now. There's a whole lot of work even though Kira is dead, tying up loose ends, I-"

"It's fine, I can put the kids to bed tonight. We can celebrate later." She hung up the phone.

Aizawa sat at his desk and rubbed his forehead to try and soothe the pain behind his eyes. Years of work had finally been finished today but there always seemed to be more to do. He had also taken on Matsuda's usual workload because that man needed a break more badly than he ever would.

Sometimes Aizawa could not remember his wife's birthday anymore.

"You should go home."

Aizawa was startled by her voice. She stood in the doorway of his office looking as crisp and professional as she always did. There was nothing that could interrupt Halle Lidner's permanent calm. Aizawa smiled weakly at her.

"I should but there are forms that are begging to be filled out and reports that want to be written." He tapped his expensive looking pen on the papers strewn about his desk.

"Take a coffee break with me at least, it would be a shame to die of a heart attack the day after you catch Kira." Aizawa laughed at that. Halle Lidner was both neutral and unemotional yet warm and pleasant. Aizawa stood up from his desk and stretched.

The air on the street was bitter and sharp. Halle walked serenely next to Aizawa who realized that he probably looked as tired as he felt. Halle never let what she was feeling show.

Aizawa understood the challenges that being a woman in a profession dominated by men held but never ceased to be impressed but Halle's practical control over any situation. She was stronger than him he was amazed to realize.

"How do you like your coffee?" Aizawa momentarily forgot her question when he became fascinated by how pink the wind had made her cheeks.

"Black." He muttered and she ordered the same. He noticed how her perfectly smooth hair had been tossed by the wind and now fell softly around her face.

Aizawa realized with horror that he had a crush on Halle Lidner.

They drank their coffee quietly in a corner booth, enjoying the warmth. They talked a lot about nothing but it was the pleasant and agreeable sort of nothing.

When Halle Lidner threw her coffee cup away Aizawa noticed one tiny spot of pastel pink nail polish still clinging to her fingernail. Somehow after that he discovered that he was kissing her. She tasted like coffee and mint gum and superiority and control.

"Aizawa , you have a wife!" She glared at him but her cheeks just got pinker and pinker. He slipped his hand into hers.

"And you have rosy cheeks and tailored suits."

She did not say a word after that. They ran down the street in the cold and coughed when they laughed.

Lidner looses her firm and sacred control. Aizawa does not feel tired anymore.

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"I always like our last lines the best." Becca remarked.

"Me to, it means the story is over." Grumbled Kim.

"I think you're intentionally trying to crush my spirit." Becca whined.

"When did you catch on?"


	7. Light X Naomi

"You know what I've just realized," Kim said, a little startled, "We haven't written about Light yet! He's the main character, how could we forget?" Becca scowled.

"Probably because he's a dick. Lets not write about Light."

"You're just bitter about the whole 'killing L' thing." Kim said with a superior toss of her bangs.

"Fine then Kim, what's his correct pairing? Don't answer that because he doesn't have one, we've used all the people he could be paired with and none of them work."

Kim was stumped by this. She thought hard for a minute, chewing her lower lip and staring into space.

"I guess he really doesn't have a correct pairing, poor Light." Kim cut off Becca's indignant squawk at this, "I guess we could write a pretty great incorrect pairing then! Who do you want to use?"

Becca looked nervous. "Well I kind of wanted to do a Naomi Misora story sometime but I don't want to pair her with Light it-"

"It's perfect!" Declared Kim and Becca moaned.

"But Kim! They only meet once and it is defiantly not a romantic meeting. There is no way we could squeeze a romance out of these two characters!"

"That is why writers like us invented the AU."

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Light Yagami is a pretty, pretty boy.

And I don't mean that in a creepy way, I used to baby sit that kid, I just mean that he an undeniably attractive in every way. Besides I have a fiancée who is defiantly the greatest thing that has ever happened to me.

I'm having tea with his parents and they are absolutely rabid to know everything about Raye. We were only visiting Japan to see my parents but I thought I should pop by and see the Yagami's before returning home to America to plan my wedding. It's also good practice to be grilled about your future husband before some old family friends before you face the real hurdle of your own parents.

Mrs. Yagami is a really sweet lady but she has basically no life because she mostly just sits around at home. This apparently has caused her to becoming completely psychotic about every detail of my life. I just want to scream 'yes the sex is good' and then maybe she would stop with this ridicules hinting and beating around the bush.

Light is kind of staring at me. He still has those weird almost golden eyes he had when he was a kid. I think I'm just going to nod my head and ignore Mrs. Yagami's prattling for now.

Light and Sayu were such weird kids.

Sayu was sweet and loud and messy and terrible to baby sit. She had a lot of spunk to her and I remember vividly how tired my 12-year-old legs would be after having her toddle out of reach all afternoon.

Light was reserved and mature and brilliant and also terrible to baby sit. He regarded himself as far to good for the ordeal and refused to treat me as any sort of authority. If I didn't do what he wanted he was practically demonic. I could recall clearly his vile little whisper hissing blackmail into my ear. But he looks like he turned out all right even though he's still scowling at me.

It must be Mr. Yagami's turn to make a long irrelevant speech because he is babbling for Japan now.

Ah, this famous speech must be called '500 billion awesome things that Light has done… oh and I think I have a daughter somewhere to'. Light has stopped looking at me and now he's looking out of the window with a furious determination. Don't worry Light; he's only going to be doing this for… about the rest of your life.

I think I have consumed more tea than is humanly possible but the charming kitchen clock is now telling me that I should go.

"Well thank you for the tea but I really must go."

"Thank you for stopping by my dear girl, Raye sounds wonderful." I kind of wish Mrs. Yagami had abridged this whole ordeal to just that.

"He sounds like an asshole."

Is it just me or did everything just get silent and poisonously awkward? Light has just gotten up and left after that leaving his parents to flounder in their horror.

"I'm so sorry he-"

"Never usually acts-"

"Very rude, I'm sorry-"

"Must be tired, overworked-"

"Been acting strange lately-"

The emergency relationship repair team fizzles out into ashamed silence. I'm pretty pissed about Light being a jerk but the sight of Mrs. Yagami's childishly ashamed and guilty face is breaking my heart.

"It's fine, those are hard years, I remember. If you guys make it to the wedding I'm sure he'll get along great with Raye." Both Yagami's pledge to brave all the world's terrors to make it to my wedding and I leave the house.

It's all gross and snowy here; the air is so cold it hurts. I miss California.

Light has snuck up behind me so quietly I didn't even notice. Perhaps he is not familiar with proper 'I have just called your true love an asshole' etiquette. He's the one who's an asshole. I think I'm going to pretend he isn't there.

"Naomi you know I'm right." Oh damn, now I can't just ignore him. Why is so cold out here?

"Light I think you should go back inside." His face is thin and adolescent but he doesn't even blink when I snap at him.

"I think I'll wait with you." I have rolled by eyes at him to show that I am not impressed by his ridicules arrogance.

"You don't even know Raye, Light!"

"He wants you to give up your job, you're life, and be only his. He's possessive and thinks he can contain you and be enough for you. You're so much more than that Naomi, I know you better. We've always been friends, since we were kids, I know he isn't enough." Light's voice has lost some of its strict composure but it is becoming increasingly hard to be upset with him.

"You don't know Raye. You're just arrogant enough to think that you can figure anything out but you can't. Not this. Not Raye. I love him Light. Maybe you don't understand what that means." I'm doing a victory dance in my head because I have totally won now. Light looks crushed. He should look crushed; he just got beaten by the power of love.

"Naomi, I love you. I always have." His voice sounds like he's being strangled.

Oh no.

"Light you're just a kid. I can't- you can't- Why would you? – I don't understand I-" I seem to have beaten myself in this fight. I'm floundering.

He has started to cry. The one thing he never did. Not even as a kid. Never.

How did I break that death grip he had on his dignity? How do you break someone's heart without even knowing it?

Raye has just pulled up and I leap into the car like an Olympic athlete and tell him to step on it. I can't stay here like this. It's too cold.

*

My ex-husband is such an asshole.

I'm standing here in the middle of the Tokyo airport waiting for one of my parents to show up with a car. I have way to much stuff to carry so I'm just standing here, perched on my miniature island of stuff.

Ever since I left Raye my life has sucked. Correction: ever since I married Raye my life has sucked.

The FBI apparently doesn't want me back now and since my ex-husband's lawyer is a demon I have basically zero income. Raye has basically destroyed me financially. That's why I have to move back in with my parents. My parents who wouldn't speak to me for a year when they found out I had gotten divorced. I guess we're supposed to reconnect and be a happy little family now but I have the impression that a lot of screaming and the words 'ruining are family' being used often are a more likely result.

I just caught a glimpse of myself in the window. I hope it's my father picking me up because my mom would flip. My hair's all greasy from traveling a lot and you can really see the weight I gained from trying to be Raye's precious little stay home wife. My thighs are all bulky now, not like when I actually had a job that made me use them, and my face looks all heavy. Eugh.

There is hair all over my dumpy little sweater so I'm picking it off in a distracted sort of way. Raye's already found some new little hooker to be his domestic beauty and she doesn't wear sweaters although I doubt that her body mass can be keeping her very warm.

He kept calling for a while to give me crap about how badly I had hurt him by leaving and how that somehow excused him for taking all my money and finding some new slut. I was mostly just mad about the fact that the FBI wouldn't hire me back now that I was fat and out of practice. It's a blow to the ego.

I just looked at my watch and my parents are nearly half an hour late. If it's my dad coming he's probably just too nervous to get out of the car (but he will never admit that is why, so he's probably still "making sure he has everything"). If it's my mom she probably thinks that making me wait in the airport will punish me and make me realize that respectable women do not go through bitter divorces where they end up in a screaming match on the phone every few days.

"Naomi Misora?"

That doesn't sound like my parents.

It is Light Yagami. He looks kind of scary thin and tired but it is definitely him. His hair is a little longer and his clothes are a little looser but it is definitely him. His eyes are still that weird almost gold only now they look darker for some reason.

What do I do?

"Light Yagami." Oh that was really snappy, I am such a genius at communication. He's wearing an expensive if slightly rumpled suit and carrying a laptop.

"What are you doing back here?" His eyes are wide and I feel suddenly aware of myself.

"I left my husband and I'm moving in with my parents because I lost my job and he took all my money and you where right so just say it." The whole story just comes flooding out of my before I can stop it. Because I'm sure everyone wants to here about my depressing life, of course.

"He is such an asshole." The ghost of a smile flickers across Light's face and I feel a little bit warmer. "Are you waiting for a car?"

"Yeah my parents were supposed to be here but maybe they've forgotten me." I sound so forlorn I have to laugh at myself.

"I could give you a ride if you need it. Big important business men are so busy earning millions of dollars that people just have to provide cars for them." I smile a little back at him but I'm still feeling self-conscience so I try to keep reserved.

"That would be nice."

We walk out of the airport and I feel comfortable with him, which surprises me. There is just a sort of vague familiarity in everything he does, which is comforting. I know he's going to ask me if I want to get some coffee before his mouth is even open. I allow myself to feel the pride of thinking that I may be the only one to be able to figure this man out.

I say yes to the coffee and I tell him that it will be my revenge against my parents for abandoning me but it is really because I don't want to leave him and go home to a hostile family.

We talk for an hour over coffee, taking careful savoring sips. I realize about half way through that the curling in my stomach is loneliness. And that is the darkness in Light Yagami's eyes as well.

We are both cold people who do not want to be touched who cannot stand to be loved, who cannot stay where we are supposed to because something is calling us and making our limbs twitch with the need to run.

I don't tell him that out loud because that would be awkward. A giant coffee cup full of cooled awkward.

"I hope I'll see you again soon Naomi." He says listlessly when we get up to leave.

"Yeah and thank you for offering to help with this whole 'unemployment' thing. The sooner I can get out of my parents house the better, seeing as I may accidentally murder them after prolonged contact."

"We big powerful business men can basically do whatever we please so it's no problem. I'm sure you're going to enjoy working with my father." I laugh at that and Light's disillusioned ghost of a smile fades into a real one.

Suddenly my heart is pounding. Uh oh, I seem to have strolled into danger land via the road of bad ideas. I am bad news, I am divorced and angry and unpleasant to have around, but somehow Light looks more my age now. Maybe he always was.

My lips stop obeying my brain, which is beating desperately against the inside of my skull, screaming protests. Light's mouth feels like it has been waiting for me but maybe it has. When he puts his arms on my waist I finally feel warm.

He looks terrified when we break apart and he is still clinging to my hand. I want to say that I'm not going anywhere and that even though I can still feel the wild streak in me, the call, I want to take him with me wherever I go. But I don't say that because as previously mentioned I have a prejudice against awkward. Except when I don't.

"See you soon Light, it's good to be back." I'm trying to tease him a little with my hips as I walk away. I feel good inside and have good feelings for tomorrow.

Oh dear one of my hip swings seems to have gotten a bit out of hand and now I'm just sort of limping.

The world is an asshole. But the good kind.

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"Hooray for overusing the word asshole." Kim cheered. Becca grinned.

"It's nice to have a theme."

"We may in fact be the best writers ever."


	8. Mrs Yagami X Mrs Aizawa

Becca and Kim were riding a wave of ego and self-confidence. Everything was going exactly as planned.

"Writing fanfiction is so much fun!" Kim remarked, feeling uncharacteristically cheery.

"We should do this more often." Replied Becca, dreamily imagining the countless tales she would spread across the Internet.

"Lets try a super weird pairing this time, obviously we can do it and it will be awesome." Kim fingered her purple bangs for the hundredth time.

"We should write about… Light's mom." Becca cackled.

"I think she's a very interesting character actually. She loses her entire family basically but it's all her sons fault. She's always shoved to the side and out of control but she still has the strength to try and keep her family together and-"

"Lets pair her with Mrs. Aizawa , I feel sorry for her since we already paired her husband with someone else." Becca said, interrupting Kim's rant.

"Obviously they are correctly paired with their husbands so we can write them incorrectly with each other." Kim continued with a touch of irritation in her voice.

"This will be awesome!" Becca danced with anticipation.

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Sayu Yagami sat quietly in her wheelchair and tried not to think. It was a habit she had picked up recently.

This was one of the many "outings" she had been forced to take lately by her mother. Sayu preferred to retreat into herself than roam about and socialize these days. But ever since her father had died (which she was concentrating hard about not thinking about) her mother had sought the company of others to help her and her eternal baggage, Sayu, had to be dragged along.

This is what led Sayu to be sitting in her wheelchair watching with vague interest as Mr. and Mrs. Aizawa 's children played on the floor in front of her. The children seemed afraid to go near Sayu's chair, probably because of her stony silence and the faded broken shards of her once vibrant youth. Sayu didn't mind. She would rather have them afraid of her if they left her alone.

The light that streamed through the window was pale grey and washed what little color there was out of Sayu's face. She shifted a little in her seat, it was too bright. She slowly wheeled herself out of the room into the dark hallway. Dim light was easy on her eyes and the children would have more fun with out her looming over them.

She paused when she heard her mother and Mrs. Aizawa 's voices floating out of the kitchen. The door was slightly open and a sliver of light fell into the hallway and gleamed off of the silver of her wheel chair. Sayu settled down quietly and peered through the crack to do what she did best these days, watch.

They were sitting at the table, grasping mugs of tea, which steamed lazily into the crisp air. Her mother's face looked drawn and her hands clasped the mug with unusual tightness.

"So you're leaving your husband?" She asked, looking into the slightly softer face of Mrs. Aizawa .

"He's practically already left. I barely see him anymore. There is nothing left to do."

"But don't you love him? Don't you care about him?" Sayu heard the forlorn edge in her mother's voice.

"You know, Sachiko, that I got married for the same reason that you did. We thought that is what we were supposed to do. We were strangled by this ridicules picture of how things should be so we tried to live up to it. Don't try to tell me that you had real passion for Soichiro because I know better. Just because he died doesn't make you love him more." Mrs. Aizawa 's tone was harsh and her mother gave a low moan at the mention of her husband.

"But your family, your children, what about them?"

"They will be fine. My children always seem to have been virtually one parented." Mrs. Aizawa 's expression suddenly became tender. "Please, come away with me Sachiko. We could get away from it all. We could leave behind all these pig-headed men trying to subdue us and take care of us and really live. You burn to brightly to go out now. Lets start over. I remember how it used to be… with us." Mrs. Aizawa was slowly leaning across the table towards her mother, her voice pleading.

Sayu watched with a growing curl of anticipation in her stomach. What was going on?

"I can't. You know I can't. I have Sayu." Sayu jumped a little at the sound of her name. "I have to take care of my daughter, I'm sorry."

Mrs. Aizawa looked like she might cry for a minute. Then slowly she leaned forward again and gently pressed her lips to Sachiko Yagami's. Mrs. Aizawa was kissing her mother. On the mouth. Like she loved her. And her mother was kissing her back.

Sayu wheeled her self back into the living room with her heart pounding. She was trying desperately to figure out what she had witnessed but one thing kept ringing in her ears over and over.

It's because of me, she thought, they can't be happy because of me. She was a useless burden, an inconvenience. She was a selfish, whiny little girl who had never paused to think that other people had problems or wishes or dreams. She had just wallowed in her self-pity while her mother did all of the work but never got anything she dreamed of. Even if that dream was a bitter middle-aged mother of two.

Her mother came out of the kitchen with a sickening fake smile and told Sayu they were going to leave now. She couldn't stand it.

Sayu stood up on shaking legs and with a voice no more than a broken whisper said,

"You should be with her. Don't think about me for once. You should go back in that kitchen and tell her you'll go with her."

Mrs. Yagami cried and hugged her daughter. Mrs. Aizawa cried and hugged everyone. Sayu found that the thing that really made her feel better had nothing to do with her at all.

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There was a long silence when they had finished. Two pairs of eyes were transfixed by what they had written. Two pairs of eyes were glazed with awe.

"We've gone to far." Said Kim, her voice hollow. "What have we done?"

Becca looked quizzically at Kim. "What's wrong with you?"

"This is wrong. These pairings are just… disrespectful to the series we love so much. How could we just write something like that? We've taken the two most minor characters and just shoved them together for no reason. What if someone reads this? What if we convinced them? We've created a monster Becca!" Kim nearly screamed the last bit at her friend.

Becca was silent, the light reflecting on her glasses making it impossible to tell what she was thinking. Kim panted for a moment, fidgeting with her limp purple bangs.

"It's just wrong Becca. You have to understand. We can't misuse our writing like this. We can't misuse Death Note like this. We owe it that much." Becca did not say a word.

"Kim! Your moms here!" Becca's mother called down to the girls.

Kim shakily packed her things together but as she headed up the stairs she turned for one last look at the basement. There were crumbs on the couch and the laptop was smudged and almost out of charge. Becca stood in the middle of the mess, in the center of the chaos, her glasses sparkling in the light shining up from the laptop. She turned to Kim finally and smiled.

"Lets post it on the internet! See you on Monday Kim!"

THE END


End file.
